Sunday, January 25, 2009

Solitude vs. Lonely

According to dictionary, solitude means being alone when this is peaceful and pleasant to the mind. Eg He enjoyed his moments of solitude before the pressure of the day began. The emphasis is on the state of mind.

When I was searching for differences between these two words, I come across this blog

which he wrote so beautifully that I read several times. ( more than 3 times) . He explained it so clear and meaningful - sound like from the heart which I have had experienced all that before.

Solitude goes together with the feeling of bliss. For eg.. all my life I dread Chinese New Year because I have to meet up with my relatives, and they being aunties and uncles will query you with lots of uncomfortable questions. The questions that indicate to me that I am are very much left behind in financial and relationship aspects.

Financial aspects meaning to have own a certain kind of property, travel to a minimum of a few countries for holidays outside Malaysia. Relationship aspects would mean to get married or at least to have a steady partner at a certain age. Though crowded with so many people I did feel lonely then.

Now as I am on my own now, I feel so bliss by not have to face to face with them anymore. Nobody to bother what I wear or how I look like, how much I earn, potential date line for marriage. No more nasty remarks, insinuation or any humiliation. Being by myself, celebrating alone is solitude to me. I cook whatever I like to eat. Sleep whenever I like to sleep. No more superstitions beliefs needed to observe. I enjoy being in the presence of my own company.

In summary when there is a presence feeling of sorrow or pain be it either alone or being in a crowd this is called loneliness.

On the either hand solitude means to have the feeling of bliss, attainment and satisfaction. in the mind.

My Love Plants -

These are few of my love plants. They are lovely aren't they.

Coconut Candy

One of my favorite goodies is coconut candy.

I used

600gm grated skinless coconut
1 tin of evaporated milk
300 gm caster sugar
120 gm butter
1/2 tsp vanilla essence

The quantity of sugar has been reduced from the
600gm to 300 gm due to diet conscious.
According to my taste this is not sweet enough. So not as mouth watering as it was when I cooked with 600 gm long time ago.

Cook the grated coconut, evaporated milk and sugar in a pan, keep stirring until mixture thicken. Add in butter, essence vanilla, stir well. Remove from pan when the mixture form into dough. Cut into square when cool.

Happy Chinese New Year 2009

Happy Chinese New Year To Everybody. This year is the year I really appreciate Chinese New Year especially when i get the news that the father to a young boy of about 3 years has passed away. That man was just about in his early thirties. He looked healthy, used to fetch his son to and from the babysitter's house daily. I heard he died after a short period of illness. So why not we enjoy our limited life span while it lasts.

Sunday, January 18, 2009


I receive a gift today. Will read it soon.

Do Not Rember The Past, Do Not have Expectation On The Future

I have read about this phrases many times in books but none strike me. Until one day it was repeated in my spiritual class. It hit me like the arrow or the head of the nail. I will never leave such a class.

This is very relevant to me. Past memories sometimes haunt me like unwanted bad dreams. Example those unfulfilled dream , shattered hopes, unrequited love, unfair defamation, destructive criticism, they do come into play so vividly like fiction writer writes flash back stories. I see young girl being humiliated because she was too simple,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,. Another scene the woman was feeling extremely sorrowful because .......... . I cannot continue, because I must seriously put a big full stop. Must make effort. The consolation is that happier times are coming if I compared the present with the past.

The second part of the sentences, "Do not have expectation on the future". That is what my nature is, I do not expect anything from anything base on extrapolation. Economy is getting more bleak, so what. I remember during the economic boom, I do not have any benefits. Sound selfish, but not selfish just self consoling.

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Forever Discontend

I draw the conclusion to night that everybody including myself are discontent with life. (at least a few times in our life time). There is nothing in life we can be contend for a long period of time eg.

When I was young I wished my parents had given me more freedom.

At times we wished to be more understood , more appreciative by our fellow friends , colleagues and family members, or maybe to have a more loving and considerate spouse, or maybe wished that our love is reciprocate by our sweet heart, our grand child, our sons, daughters, etc.

Many times I wished I were rich so that I can afford to travel more, eat more good food, buy more advanced products.

Haven't anyone wished before to have experience something that was described in love novels. Eg. to watch the view of sunset together with our loved one at the beach. Sitting side by side on the soft sand leaning against a tree. Talking non stop till mid night, with intervals of looking and staring at the face of our loved one. Give a loving kiss on the cheek here and there. Stay over night at the beach cuddling each other and waking up to watch the sun rise again.

Life is a bull shit. If I were asked permission whether to be reborn or not , I would have really take time to reconsider and contemplate deeply. Most probably impose/offer conditions too.

Now only come across my mind, I have a few things to be appreciative .

1. So thankful that i was not born in Israel or Palestine countries as they are having war now.

2. Glad that I was not born in some poor Africa countries too, or else i will be starving.

3. Happy to say that I am healthy enough to blog tonite and not sick in any hospitals or encounter any natural calamities as in some states. eg flooding in Sarawak.

Is this pre-destined, Law of karma or what, I really wonder.

Thursday, January 8, 2009

What the big fuss of watching xxxx or the blue

There are a few matters in life that I cannot completely understand. One of them is people regard watching X-rated movies as if it is something to be scorned, disrespectful. Watching blue movies by itself is not a sin or improper. It depends on the intention of the viewer. Some regard watching xxx as if a taboo.

I have known a few people who had watched xxx and they have not involved in any sexual activity with any partner. (Please take note. I do not imply me, hehe.)

Looking at the educational aspect of the movie, it helps one to understand better what has been going on around inside the closed room of married couples. Majority people married for sex aren't they? especially the men. So isn't this is just a view of the action being taking place among couples. Presently as the paper also publishes people are involved in sex party, and sex between the same gender. It is a lot more healthy to watch the blue movie than to participate. One save oneself from potential HIV, herpes or even any unwanted pregnancies. Lots of energy are wasted in this activity.

Normally the interest in watching xxx movie will not last permanently. After seeing for a period of time, one will get bored with it. This too is just another type of movie and another phase of time.

If one were to say that one can imitate the act through watching, that I disagree. Movie alone doesn't so easily influence us. This is depending on the person's own character and attitude.

Sunday, January 4, 2009

Spirituality Lessons - Sharing

The class starts early in the morning. As usual I try very hard not to miss the Sunday class. There are 9 pages of lessons today. Though I may not be completely alert during the 9 pages of lessons was read, I fully aware the meaning of the contents. Briefly they are :

1. Recently people celebrate the New Year whereas we children are given a new life. Everyday is a new day, as the no days will never repeat again. Therefore use each breath and time in a worthwhile way. None going to waste ideally.

2. By having treasure of knowledge and clear intellect one will be able to be so sensible that one do not need any advisor.

3.World transformation is self transformation. As we are unable to change the other party, we have to change ourself.

4. Become equal to the father. Do everything as He will do. That is not difficult, is it? It is easy to copy, is it not?

5. Just see, speak and do everything positive.

6. If any mistakes or events occur do not go into que of questions such as "Why?, What?, When? How". etc. Sit on the seat of awareness and one will not be upset.

7. Bid farewell to anger and its progeny. Bid farewell to weaknesses and defects.

8. Let every day and night be spent in zeal and enthusiasm. Fly and continue to make others fly.

9. The Father is bound to help one if one called out to Him. (conditions - do not keep other things/rubbish in your heart)

I may not completely practise what I have been taught, but listening to the 9 pages lessons -approx 2 hrs, I did feel so peaceful and soothing.

I am a peaceful soul.
Saya adalah rohani yang murni.

Friday, January 2, 2009

Small uncommon marketing

So glad that I have sold my extra new unused rice cooker through the Published today and also close the deal same day today. It was a annual dinner lucky draw gift. Chinese New Year is coming and I wanted to clear stock. Still I have another 4 units of rice cookers at home to spare. Funny er. Last year I have 2 gifts (both coincidentally are rice cookers) as lucky draw gifts.

Another item that I sell is hand phone credits. Whenever my hand phone credits reaches above RM600, I will sell it through the credit transfer facilities. To induce my buyers I shall give them RM1 extra for each RM10/- that they give me. Normally I am will not be able to finish my telephone credits in the specified time. Every two months, have to reload RM60/-. Since a few years I have sold phone credits. I shall stop selling when it reaches RM500/- My friend jokingly said, " I don't want your hand phone but I want your SIM card". See how very poor am I to still using Nokia 3310 since year 2002. Who else are still using Nokia 3310 these days. Even small children also use 3G colour camera phone. This is my first hand phone and I will only change it after it kaput due to financial constraints.